****
#5- July 28, 2008: Good Lord, I Hate Wisconsin (Box score)
There's only one word that describes this game: Intensity. For the second straight year, the Cubs and Brewers were battling for the NL Central title. Because of these circumstances, it ended up being the most intense game of my life.
There's only one word that describes this game: Intensity. For the second straight year, the Cubs and Brewers were battling for the NL Central title. Because of these circumstances, it ended up being the most intense game of my life.
A four game series at Miller Park would finish out July. As of Monday, the teams were deadlocked in first place. Whoever came out of this series on top would have a ton of momentum moving forward into August. I can't speak for anyone else that was in the park that night, but I was truly hanging on every pitch.
.JPG)
The Cubs lineup wasn't any different than the norm, but one Brewer made the game much more interesting.
That's right, CC Sabathia. (I bet you forgot the Brewers had him. I sure did until I started writing about this game.)
Two weeks earlier, I was up here with Sean and saw CC pitch in just his third start with his new team. (Despite being a career AL pitcher, he hit a home run that clanked off the right field foul pole. Talk about a baseball oddity.)
Most of my emotion going into this game came from my hatred for Brewer fans. I cheered obnoxiously loud when the Cubs made a play, and even louder when the Brewers missed one. I was 16 at the time, at the tail end of being considered a kid. If I tried this funny business today, I would never be able to do or say the same things without a response from someone.
The Cubs had a 2-0 lead until JJ Hardy and Ryan Braun hit back to back homers in the 5th. Corey Hart smoked an RBI double a few batters later and knocked in one more.
I was devastated. The only thing I wanted in the entire world was to win this game and raise my W flag. Nothing would make me happier, and nothing would make Brewer fans more angry.
The game was tied at the end of the 7th, and stayed that way until the top of the 9th. I was extremely relieved when Derrek Lee drove Alfonz in with a double to put us ahead by one. A Mark DeRosa hit added another to make the score 6-4.
The bottom of the 9th was almost a catastrophe. Carlos Marmol started with his nastiest stuff, making the first two batters look like fools. After walking the third batter, Marmol appeared to strike out Gabe Kapler to end the game. The Cubs celebrated on the infield before noticing the umpire was calling them back, saying that the pitch was tipped.
All the fielders took their spots to re-do the 1-2 pitch. After a few more foul tips, Kapler connected. It was a HIGH, deep drive to left field. My heart stopped as I begged gravity to do it's work. I wouldn't know what to do with myself if they blew this lead and lost the game, especially after victory was snatched from their hands.
But not to worry; Alfonz backpedaled and squeezed it for the final out, right in front of where we were sitting.
The Cubs would sweep the series, including an 11-4 ass whooping in the Thursday finale. In just four days, the Cubs destroyed the good vibe at Miller Park. It was like a dream come true.
I remember one specific play from that 7th inning like it was yesterday. Derrek Lee hit a perfect double play ball to JJ Hardy at short. He flipped it to Rickie Weeks for the first out, but Weeks' throw to Prince Fielder was way off. I felt the energy from the entire stadium shift in slow motion as the ball kept cutting farther and farther away from Fielder. It sailed by him, and another run scored to put the Cubs in the lead 4-3. I screamed so loud that I almost passed out. Had the throw been on line, the inning would have been over. That play had a HUGE impact on the game, and maybe even the rest of the season.
#4- July 11, 2008- The Classic (Boxscore)
Quite often in 2007 and 2008, I would watch games on TV and really wish I was at Wrigley. Some games during the summer just seemed like the best ones to be present for. I never once found myself at a game that ended up being spectacular and living up to my imaginary standards.
Thanks to Ebert, we had fantastic seats in aisle 106 for a Friday afternoon game against the Giants.
Let's skip to the the best part- the point where the game started to transform into exactly what I was looking for.
It was the middle of the 8th inning, and not a single run had been scored. This in itself almost put the game in in the special category. Matt Cain and Jason Marquis both went 7 innings, even though they were polar opposites in terms of pitching ability. I didn't care how ugly the end of the game was. If the Cubs came out on top, it would make my week.
The bottom of the 8th started with Ryan Theriot pulling a single into left field. Any base runner was huge at this point. Mike Fontenot promptly bunted him over, and Derrek Lee had a prime RBI opportunity.
For some reason, the Giants decided to intentionally walk him. As soon as the first ball was thrown, there was a buzz in the crowd. That was a bad idea for the Giants, and all 41,000 fans knew it.
Aramis Ramirez waited on deck. Everyone in the stadium had seen this situation play out before. I knew he would come through; I felt it with every bone in my body.
Sure enough, he absolutely smashed the first pitch. It came off the bat so fast that I lost sight of it. All I knew was that it was in the air, almost directly above us, and was going to make it out to Waveland. The Bleacher fans signaled it had left the yard, and the Cubs were ahead 3-0.
Kerry Wood came on for the save in the 9th, and didn't exactly make it the most relaxing inning. He gave up a double, a walk, and a single that brought in a run before pulling it together. He then retired the next three batters in order, putting the finishing touch on the game I had been dreaming about.
It was more of a 'had to be there' moment; the special connection of seeing it live is something you need to have in order to feel the same way as I do.
Sometimes I imagine that home run over and over in my head just to get an adrenaline rush. Four and a half years later, and it still does the trick.
#3- September 21st, 2008- Best Birthday Ever (Box score)
On September 20, 2008, the Cubs effectively ended their regular season by finally winning the division title. That was also my 17th birthday. I couldn't have asked for a better present. And I was pissed.
You see, about three weeks ago, Ebert told me he had gotten the same seats as the Aramis game for Sunday the 21st. As the magic number dwindled down, we were praying that the Brewers would get one more win, or the Cubs would somehow blow a game so we could be there for the clincher. Seeing the Cubs win the division was one of the rarest feats out there. It's pure luck to have tickets in advance for the game when it finally happens.
And we missed it all. By one measly day.
I have to give some credit to my friends for cheering me up. They threw me a surprise party, and kept it completely secret, even after switching the date twice. All my fellow Cub fans were there, and we talked about how excited we were for the next month of baseball. It almost felt like a celebration party rather than my birthday.
No one had a care in the world. The monkey was off our back, and it was time to enjoy the celebration. It was the next best thing to being there for the clinch.
And yet, the day had one more special detail. This was the first time I would see the Cardinals at Wrigley. Typically, that meant a rivalry game that had some sort of importance. But today, there was nothing to fight over. They had already lost the battle, and would be sitting at home in a week.
Our group joked that it would be the Iowa Cubs taking on the St.Louis Cardinals, since it's almost certain that every Cubs bench player would be starting over the regulars. We didn't think it would be anything like THIS:
The Cubs won 5-1 despite putting mostly a minor league team out there. It didn't matter how it happened or with which group of guys played. Today, we enjoyed it all the same.
I wasn't exaggerating when I said everything was more peaceful. The general vibe from fellow fans is what sticks out above anything else. Nobody was tense or worried. It was the most rewarding and relaxing day I had ever spent at a ballpark.
#2- October 1, 2008- This Was Going to Be the Year (Box score)
How many times have I mentioned the 2008 season on BaseBlog? Almost too many. But here it was, the beginning of the end; the end that was 100 years in the making.
The Cubs were going to win the World Series.
Just absorb that previous sentence and think about it. Try to realize how much magnitude that statement carries, and the feelings it brings out. This was the start of it all. Game 1 of the National League Division Series.
It felt like a dream when reality finally set in.
My friend STEVE and I both entered the Postseason ticket lottery, and he's the one who got picked. We were going for actual seats, but ended up with one of the first sets of SRO tickets. Since I already had my great spot from last year's playoff game, I was perfectly fine going seat-less. I wanted to go back to that spot, simply to turn the anger and frustration from last year's playoff game into happiness and joy.
Thanks to dumb TBS scheduling, the game would start at 5:30 on a Wednesday. We made the executive decision to skip last few periods of the school day and catch the Pace bus. It was super easy, and would still get us there in plenty of time to go in early and snag my spot.
We stepped off the bus at Addison and Sheffield at exactly 3:30, just as school was getting out. Seeing that really got me pumped up. This was a MUCH better place to be than school or marching band practice.
The sky was overcast, which produced a fairly brisk temperature. I was fascinated by the difference in weather from one year to the next, even though the dates were just a few days apart. Last year, the sun was shining bright and I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt like it was the middle of July. But now, it was dark and gloomy. I saw this as a sign, telling me that this year would be different; different than last year or any other year before then. It really was going to happen.
The clouds seemed so quiet; peaceful, plain, and undisturbed. The scene around Wrigley wasn't necessarily a party atmosphere, but the amount of energy, tension, and nervousness around the park made for the most goosebump inducing feeling of anxiousness. It was one of the weirdest contrasts I'd ever seen (or felt.)
After soaking it in for just a few seconds, we quickly moved through 7/11 to grab the obligatory Big Gulp before going inside. We saw the gates were already opened, so we hustled past the ticket scanners and up the stairs. I was ecstatic to see the area behind the seats was completely open. It was good to be back.
We had quite a bit of down time, more than an hour and a half until the game. The biting wind was blowing, just as we expected, and we knew it was going to feel worse as it got colder. As much as I didn't want to, I agreed to go see what my spot's left field counterpart was like.
Long story short, it was the same. Plus, I was very attached to the first spot. We decided to go back to right field.
The next hour consisted of just standing around. We watched people file into their seats and other SRO fans claim their space on the ramps leading to the upper deck.
About 20 minutes before game time, the PA announcer went through the roster and introduced every player and staff member from the dugouts.
That's one of my favorite things to see at a baseball game. Whenever it happens, it's either because a new season is beginning, or you made it to the playoffs.
The Cubs got a thunderous welcome from all 42,100 fans when they took the field, almost as if to say "We believe in you. Don't let us down."
Ryan Dempster was the Cubs best starter all season, so Lou Piniella gave him the ball in Game 1. There was a little bit of a debate on the subject; Carlos Zambrano was always been the go-to guy who fans felt most comfortable with in important games. Personally, I was glad Dempster got it. Numbers never lie, Zambrano didn't do jack against the D'Backs the year before, and Dempster was an exponentially more level headed individual.
The first inning was more nerve-wracking than it should have been. Not because of anything Dempster did, though. Nothing was more crucial for the Cubs than preventing the Dodgers from getting a hot start. (After the first pitch, I turned to Steve and exclaimed "Hey, better than last year's game already!")
In the bottom of the 2nd, Jim Edmonds got the first hit of the game by treading the needle between short and third. Mark DeRosa came up next.
He went the opposite way on a long, low, line drive that was heading deep into the right field corner. Because of the wall parallel to the foul line, we couldn't see if it hit off the ivy or made it over the wall. We had to take a second or two and rely on the Bleacher fans to tell us it went out. It barley made it into the basket, and Cubs led 2-0! (I was wearing a t-shirt with his name on it to this game. It was the first and only time I wore it when he was a member of the team.)
That was an amazing moment. We had a two run buffer, and could breathe just a little bit easier. We would just need to score a few more runs somehow and have faith that our best pitcher wouldn't implode.
Everything was going great until the top of the 5th. We couldn't have asked any more of Dempster in this high pressure situation; just two hits and four walks with zero runs given up.
He started with an out....fifth walk... second out....sixth walk....seventh walk....
Grand Slam.
In a matter of about 15 minutes, everything was gone.
Dempster gave up a double to Matt Kemp after that. Moans of agony and sadness swept through the stands. Lou came out, and Demp was done.
Now it was time to just wait for the inevitable. There were a few moments where I prayed and hoped that the Cubs would prove me wrong, but it became weakly hit ball after weakly hit ball whenever they would get someone on base.
Manny Ramirez, the one hitter fans were most scared of, hit a solo homer in the 7th. That was the deciding moment. It wasn't going to happen. Not just the game, either. All of it.
I was numb for the rest of the game. No emotion, no feeling, just staring blankly as our outs dwindled down and the Dodgers scored more runs. It was only Game 1, but losing took the wind out of the sails of both the players and fans.
Towards the end of the game, we walked around to get closer to where the bus would bring us back to Schaumburg.
Final score: 7-2.
I picked up a "It's Gonna Happen" sign that was laying on the ground before leaving. Steve got mad that I would "even want to think of keeping that piece of crap."
No matter how terrible I felt, this game needed to be remembered. I still have the sign sitting in the corner of my room. Every time I notice it, I think of both the happy and depressing moments standing in right field and leaning on the railing, bundled up for the chilly October evening.
The bus ride was almost silent. Steve and I sure didn't want to talk to each other. We just kept showing each other texts we got from friends and family. Many had an angry tone, but there were some people who had their hear broken, too.
Was this a good game? Not at all. But to not put it into 'My Best Games' would be ignoring something that was very, very important to the relationship I had with the team I care about the most.
I know I watched all Game 2, but don't remember much of anything. The only thing I was hoping for was a single win, just to avoid embarrassment. The result was worse than Game 1; another loss, 10-3.
I didn't even care about Game 3. I would get no benefit or enjoyment from sitting through it and watching them lose. I opted to go on a date with Kyra instead; one of the first ones we had. I flipped it on when I got home at about 10:30 and was falling asleep in the bottom of the 8th. I turned it off and went to bed without giving it a second thought. That was it. Season over.
I had seen the Cubs play countless games, cheered for them with all my heart, and idolized players as I grew up. Now they had crushed my hopes and disappointed me more than I ever thought was possible.
I've spent weeks thinking about what I want to say in this closing message, but I still can't put my feelings into words. When you get so close, especially experiencing it for the first time, it's so unreal. Yet, it's happening right in front of you. Then when it's taken away, it becomes denial and disbelief. "What happened? Where was the play we saw all season? Are they just going to roll over and die like this? After all I gave them season?"
Just a few months ago, when I asked my dad about 1984, he said almost those exact words. It was at that point where I realized I didn't know what I was getting myself into until I had one of those true experiences of heartbreak.
I tried to think of a clever quote, like 'It's all part of the job description' or 'I guess it's the life I chose'. None of those fit. Being a Cub fan is more than watching a team. It's becoming part of a family that you'll be able to share your happiness with when it finally does happen.
It's so, so much more than a game.
The Cubs had a 2-0 lead until JJ Hardy and Ryan Braun hit back to back homers in the 5th. Corey Hart smoked an RBI double a few batters later and knocked in one more.
I was devastated. The only thing I wanted in the entire world was to win this game and raise my W flag. Nothing would make me happier, and nothing would make Brewer fans more angry.
The game was tied at the end of the 7th, and stayed that way until the top of the 9th. I was extremely relieved when Derrek Lee drove Alfonz in with a double to put us ahead by one. A Mark DeRosa hit added another to make the score 6-4.
The bottom of the 9th was almost a catastrophe. Carlos Marmol started with his nastiest stuff, making the first two batters look like fools. After walking the third batter, Marmol appeared to strike out Gabe Kapler to end the game. The Cubs celebrated on the infield before noticing the umpire was calling them back, saying that the pitch was tipped.
All the fielders took their spots to re-do the 1-2 pitch. After a few more foul tips, Kapler connected. It was a HIGH, deep drive to left field. My heart stopped as I begged gravity to do it's work. I wouldn't know what to do with myself if they blew this lead and lost the game, especially after victory was snatched from their hands.
But not to worry; Alfonz backpedaled and squeezed it for the final out, right in front of where we were sitting.
The Cubs would sweep the series, including an 11-4 ass whooping in the Thursday finale. In just four days, the Cubs destroyed the good vibe at Miller Park. It was like a dream come true.
I remember one specific play from that 7th inning like it was yesterday. Derrek Lee hit a perfect double play ball to JJ Hardy at short. He flipped it to Rickie Weeks for the first out, but Weeks' throw to Prince Fielder was way off. I felt the energy from the entire stadium shift in slow motion as the ball kept cutting farther and farther away from Fielder. It sailed by him, and another run scored to put the Cubs in the lead 4-3. I screamed so loud that I almost passed out. Had the throw been on line, the inning would have been over. That play had a HUGE impact on the game, and maybe even the rest of the season.
#4- July 11, 2008- The Classic (Boxscore)
Quite often in 2007 and 2008, I would watch games on TV and really wish I was at Wrigley. Some games during the summer just seemed like the best ones to be present for. I never once found myself at a game that ended up being spectacular and living up to my imaginary standards.
Thanks to Ebert, we had fantastic seats in aisle 106 for a Friday afternoon game against the Giants.
Let's skip to the the best part- the point where the game started to transform into exactly what I was looking for.
It was the middle of the 8th inning, and not a single run had been scored. This in itself almost put the game in in the special category. Matt Cain and Jason Marquis both went 7 innings, even though they were polar opposites in terms of pitching ability. I didn't care how ugly the end of the game was. If the Cubs came out on top, it would make my week.
The bottom of the 8th started with Ryan Theriot pulling a single into left field. Any base runner was huge at this point. Mike Fontenot promptly bunted him over, and Derrek Lee had a prime RBI opportunity.
For some reason, the Giants decided to intentionally walk him. As soon as the first ball was thrown, there was a buzz in the crowd. That was a bad idea for the Giants, and all 41,000 fans knew it.
Aramis Ramirez waited on deck. Everyone in the stadium had seen this situation play out before. I knew he would come through; I felt it with every bone in my body.
Sure enough, he absolutely smashed the first pitch. It came off the bat so fast that I lost sight of it. All I knew was that it was in the air, almost directly above us, and was going to make it out to Waveland. The Bleacher fans signaled it had left the yard, and the Cubs were ahead 3-0.
Kerry Wood came on for the save in the 9th, and didn't exactly make it the most relaxing inning. He gave up a double, a walk, and a single that brought in a run before pulling it together. He then retired the next three batters in order, putting the finishing touch on the game I had been dreaming about.
It was more of a 'had to be there' moment; the special connection of seeing it live is something you need to have in order to feel the same way as I do.
Sometimes I imagine that home run over and over in my head just to get an adrenaline rush. Four and a half years later, and it still does the trick.
#3- September 21st, 2008- Best Birthday Ever (Box score)
On September 20, 2008, the Cubs effectively ended their regular season by finally winning the division title. That was also my 17th birthday. I couldn't have asked for a better present. And I was pissed.
You see, about three weeks ago, Ebert told me he had gotten the same seats as the Aramis game for Sunday the 21st. As the magic number dwindled down, we were praying that the Brewers would get one more win, or the Cubs would somehow blow a game so we could be there for the clincher. Seeing the Cubs win the division was one of the rarest feats out there. It's pure luck to have tickets in advance for the game when it finally happens.
And we missed it all. By one measly day.
I have to give some credit to my friends for cheering me up. They threw me a surprise party, and kept it completely secret, even after switching the date twice. All my fellow Cub fans were there, and we talked about how excited we were for the next month of baseball. It almost felt like a celebration party rather than my birthday.
****
When walking to the park on that Sunday afternoon, the world was a better place. Birds chirped more sweetly, the sun shined a little brighter, and it seemed like people in the neighborhood were truly happy and at peace.No one had a care in the world. The monkey was off our back, and it was time to enjoy the celebration. It was the next best thing to being there for the clinch.
And yet, the day had one more special detail. This was the first time I would see the Cardinals at Wrigley. Typically, that meant a rivalry game that had some sort of importance. But today, there was nothing to fight over. They had already lost the battle, and would be sitting at home in a week.
Our group joked that it would be the Iowa Cubs taking on the St.Louis Cardinals, since it's almost certain that every Cubs bench player would be starting over the regulars. We didn't think it would be anything like THIS:
The Cubs won 5-1 despite putting mostly a minor league team out there. It didn't matter how it happened or with which group of guys played. Today, we enjoyed it all the same.
I wasn't exaggerating when I said everything was more peaceful. The general vibe from fellow fans is what sticks out above anything else. Nobody was tense or worried. It was the most rewarding and relaxing day I had ever spent at a ballpark.
#2- October 1, 2008- This Was Going to Be the Year (Box score)
How many times have I mentioned the 2008 season on BaseBlog? Almost too many. But here it was, the beginning of the end; the end that was 100 years in the making.
The Cubs were going to win the World Series.
Just absorb that previous sentence and think about it. Try to realize how much magnitude that statement carries, and the feelings it brings out. This was the start of it all. Game 1 of the National League Division Series.
It felt like a dream when reality finally set in.
Thanks to dumb TBS scheduling, the game would start at 5:30 on a Wednesday. We made the executive decision to skip last few periods of the school day and catch the Pace bus. It was super easy, and would still get us there in plenty of time to go in early and snag my spot.
We stepped off the bus at Addison and Sheffield at exactly 3:30, just as school was getting out. Seeing that really got me pumped up. This was a MUCH better place to be than school or marching band practice.
The sky was overcast, which produced a fairly brisk temperature. I was fascinated by the difference in weather from one year to the next, even though the dates were just a few days apart. Last year, the sun was shining bright and I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt like it was the middle of July. But now, it was dark and gloomy. I saw this as a sign, telling me that this year would be different; different than last year or any other year before then. It really was going to happen.
The clouds seemed so quiet; peaceful, plain, and undisturbed. The scene around Wrigley wasn't necessarily a party atmosphere, but the amount of energy, tension, and nervousness around the park made for the most goosebump inducing feeling of anxiousness. It was one of the weirdest contrasts I'd ever seen (or felt.)
After soaking it in for just a few seconds, we quickly moved through 7/11 to grab the obligatory Big Gulp before going inside. We saw the gates were already opened, so we hustled past the ticket scanners and up the stairs. I was ecstatic to see the area behind the seats was completely open. It was good to be back.
We had quite a bit of down time, more than an hour and a half until the game. The biting wind was blowing, just as we expected, and we knew it was going to feel worse as it got colder. As much as I didn't want to, I agreed to go see what my spot's left field counterpart was like.
 |
| The blank scoreboard made it all sink in even more. The other series listed are Brewers/Phillies, along with Angels/Red Sox and Rays/White Sox on the AL side. |
The next hour consisted of just standing around. We watched people file into their seats and other SRO fans claim their space on the ramps leading to the upper deck.
About 20 minutes before game time, the PA announcer went through the roster and introduced every player and staff member from the dugouts.
That's one of my favorite things to see at a baseball game. Whenever it happens, it's either because a new season is beginning, or you made it to the playoffs.
The Cubs got a thunderous welcome from all 42,100 fans when they took the field, almost as if to say "We believe in you. Don't let us down."
Ryan Dempster was the Cubs best starter all season, so Lou Piniella gave him the ball in Game 1. There was a little bit of a debate on the subject; Carlos Zambrano was always been the go-to guy who fans felt most comfortable with in important games. Personally, I was glad Dempster got it. Numbers never lie, Zambrano didn't do jack against the D'Backs the year before, and Dempster was an exponentially more level headed individual.
The first inning was more nerve-wracking than it should have been. Not because of anything Dempster did, though. Nothing was more crucial for the Cubs than preventing the Dodgers from getting a hot start. (After the first pitch, I turned to Steve and exclaimed "Hey, better than last year's game already!")
In the bottom of the 2nd, Jim Edmonds got the first hit of the game by treading the needle between short and third. Mark DeRosa came up next.
He went the opposite way on a long, low, line drive that was heading deep into the right field corner. Because of the wall parallel to the foul line, we couldn't see if it hit off the ivy or made it over the wall. We had to take a second or two and rely on the Bleacher fans to tell us it went out. It barley made it into the basket, and Cubs led 2-0! (I was wearing a t-shirt with his name on it to this game. It was the first and only time I wore it when he was a member of the team.)
That was an amazing moment. We had a two run buffer, and could breathe just a little bit easier. We would just need to score a few more runs somehow and have faith that our best pitcher wouldn't implode.
Everything was going great until the top of the 5th. We couldn't have asked any more of Dempster in this high pressure situation; just two hits and four walks with zero runs given up.
He started with an out....fifth walk... second out....sixth walk....seventh walk....
Grand Slam.
 |
| I still cringe whenever I see James Loney or hear his name mentioned. |
Dempster gave up a double to Matt Kemp after that. Moans of agony and sadness swept through the stands. Lou came out, and Demp was done.
Now it was time to just wait for the inevitable. There were a few moments where I prayed and hoped that the Cubs would prove me wrong, but it became weakly hit ball after weakly hit ball whenever they would get someone on base.
Manny Ramirez, the one hitter fans were most scared of, hit a solo homer in the 7th. That was the deciding moment. It wasn't going to happen. Not just the game, either. All of it.
I was numb for the rest of the game. No emotion, no feeling, just staring blankly as our outs dwindled down and the Dodgers scored more runs. It was only Game 1, but losing took the wind out of the sails of both the players and fans.
Towards the end of the game, we walked around to get closer to where the bus would bring us back to Schaumburg.
Final score: 7-2.
I picked up a "It's Gonna Happen" sign that was laying on the ground before leaving. Steve got mad that I would "even want to think of keeping that piece of crap."
No matter how terrible I felt, this game needed to be remembered. I still have the sign sitting in the corner of my room. Every time I notice it, I think of both the happy and depressing moments standing in right field and leaning on the railing, bundled up for the chilly October evening.
The bus ride was almost silent. Steve and I sure didn't want to talk to each other. We just kept showing each other texts we got from friends and family. Many had an angry tone, but there were some people who had their hear broken, too.
****
Was this a good game? Not at all. But to not put it into 'My Best Games' would be ignoring something that was very, very important to the relationship I had with the team I care about the most.
I know I watched all Game 2, but don't remember much of anything. The only thing I was hoping for was a single win, just to avoid embarrassment. The result was worse than Game 1; another loss, 10-3.
I didn't even care about Game 3. I would get no benefit or enjoyment from sitting through it and watching them lose. I opted to go on a date with Kyra instead; one of the first ones we had. I flipped it on when I got home at about 10:30 and was falling asleep in the bottom of the 8th. I turned it off and went to bed without giving it a second thought. That was it. Season over.
I had seen the Cubs play countless games, cheered for them with all my heart, and idolized players as I grew up. Now they had crushed my hopes and disappointed me more than I ever thought was possible.
I've spent weeks thinking about what I want to say in this closing message, but I still can't put my feelings into words. When you get so close, especially experiencing it for the first time, it's so unreal. Yet, it's happening right in front of you. Then when it's taken away, it becomes denial and disbelief. "What happened? Where was the play we saw all season? Are they just going to roll over and die like this? After all I gave them season?"
Just a few months ago, when I asked my dad about 1984, he said almost those exact words. It was at that point where I realized I didn't know what I was getting myself into until I had one of those true experiences of heartbreak.
I tried to think of a clever quote, like 'It's all part of the job description' or 'I guess it's the life I chose'. None of those fit. Being a Cub fan is more than watching a team. It's becoming part of a family that you'll be able to share your happiness with when it finally does happen.
It's so, so much more than a game.
No comments:
Post a Comment